LJN was a toy company and video game publisher that was notorious for its poorly made licensed video games. It is, by far, the gaming company whose output is most frequently criticized by the Nerd. The Nerd's various criticisms of LJN often focus on negative aspects such as rushed production, prolific glitches and the company's attempt to make easy money by producing games that would capitalize on the relative popularity of movies or other intellectual properties in non-gaming media, while often failing to provide any noticeable reflection of said IP.
The Nerd also talks about LJN being what seems like the only game company who can get a hold of the licensing for movie rights to make video games. This presses the pen down, so to say. The joystick is already overly sensitive Why could there be. Maybe we can get some lasers coming out of the parrot's eyes! Yeah, it's my best. The diagonals are the biggest problem. I just want to see if I can draw a circle.
Ohhh, man! That's it. I can draw draw rounder shapes. That's my best spiral That's my best person. I'm not joking around; the controls are SO bad Look at the family on the box. What could they possibly be so overjoyed about? Yeah, I drew a fucking line! Can you even tell what I'm trying to do here? I'm trying to give the panda a bottle of beer. I can't even make a visual joke here. This game gives me nothing to work with. I can't even land the cursor inside the nose!
And when you're pressing down and rocking the joystick around like this So, guess you gotta get some really strong earmuffs. And just to add insult to injury, on the box, the panda is colored in perfectly. How can you market it as a coloring program when there isn't.
Shouldn't there be a paint bucket tool? You might as well save that toilet paper! It's worth a whole lot more! It had a stylus pen, making it the first touch-screen game console; and PDA features like a phonebook, a calendar, a calculator, and a built-in solitaire game.
You could even connect a dial-up modem into it to access the internet, text-only. I don't believe it myself. Imagine reading your e-mail on this thing. And you'd have to hook it up to a modem so you couldn't leave your house anyway I know what I'm thinking: I might carve a giraffe out of wood and decorate it with Christmas lights so I can put it up in an albatross nest. Did you expect me to say that? Probably not. Neither would you expect this crazy idea of a video game!
Case closed! It sucks. Tiger put LJN to shame! Yeah, LJN laid down turd after turd after turd, but Tiger was like a machine gun ass, shitting out turturturturturturturtu-t-turd! These are the worst games I've ever had the honor of playing - if you even count them as video games!
Batman Returns, the wrist game. Oh boy God, I hate this shit! You know The Bullshit Man : Packaging that you need scissors to open. Even with the scissors, it's still a pain in the ass! Why is this plastic so fucking strong? This stuff is bulletproof! Nobody wants this shit, so why do they do it? They use it on everything! This kind of packaging should be outlawed! Why does it still exist? I especially love when you buy scissors and you need scissors to open the scissors.
What fuckin' idiots think this is a good idea? Community Showcase More. Follow TV Tropes. You need to login to do this. Get Known if you don't have an account.
From the Ikari Warriors episode: Where did their hair go?
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